Denying Ecstasy (The Guardians of the Realms Series) Read online

  Conn popped it open in a second, and then frowned. “Rain, are you okay?”

  “Actually, I was hoping you could help me.”

  “Come in.” He held the door open so she could enter the massive room with electronics everywhere. There were a couple of desks in the back. A huge solid wood table sat in the middle with chairs surrounding it. “What’s wrong?”

  She almost snorted. What wasn’t wrong with her situation? It didn’t help to dwell on it. “Is there anywhere else for me to stay? Somewhere that’s still safe but will allow me some privacy. A place to cook so I don’t need to go to the main kitchen.” She bit her lip.

  He just stared at her for a second. She knew he scented her arousal, but was sweet enough to ignore it. “I’m really sorry, Rain. He will eventually come to his senses. Don’t give up on him.”

  “I don’t even know him. There’s nothing to give up,” she said, and she knew bitterness hung on her words and hated it. She pinched the bridge of her nose. “I just hate that everything’s dependent on what he wants. His emotional baggage. I haven’t had a say in any of it, and everything comes from everyone but him.” Damn it, she didn’t go to Conn to have a pity party. “Never mind. I don’t even want to talk about him. I just don’t want to feel awkward in the halls anymore. Can you help me out?”

  She was so damn tired and knew it was only going to get worse.

  “There are a couple of cottages on the property, and they’re equipped with small kitchens. I’ll get one set up with food and help you move in there.”

  She blew out a relieved breath. Good. A cottage of her own sounded amazing. “Thank you.”

  Chapter 8

  Guardian Manor, Tetartos Realm

  It felt as if she were in a cloud. Her body was weightless. She was dreaming? Brianne looked over the grass and felt a heated connection to the male she saw crouched there. A beautiful white lion with bright sapphire eyes.

  He was more dangerous to her than any male had been in her long life. Even now, she itched to know what his fur felt like all over her skin. She’d never experienced a connection like theirs. They’d been playing the same risky game for decades. Those wild bouts of sex to fuel their body’s needs had turned to something else over a month ago.

  He changed into his human form as she watched, his bright eyes scanning the beautiful meadow. It was her dream haven and was safe. His gaze landed on her and heated. That look alone made her breasts swell. The gorgeous nude male stalked toward her with the grace of his animal, and she was transfixed by all his muscled beauty. Her stomach clenched. She wanted to launch herself at him as she always did.

  “What’s happening?” he growled out. He was frowning instead of thrilled to see her. She narrowed her eyes. He was always happy to see her; she scoffed at his attitude.

  “It’s my dream. Stop fucking it up, kitty!” she demanded with her hands on her hips. She narrowed her eyes at her dream Vane.

  He furrowed his brow before smirking. When the smirk turned to a sexy and seductive smile, she was slightly mollified. “Do you always dream about me, my little songbird?” The words were a soft purr that made gooseflesh rise over her skin. She angled her body. She was just as bare as he was. Her nipples tightened at the way he looked at her, tracking over her body. His eyes were intense now. Nowhere was the playfulness he showed to the world, and she fucking loved that his intensity seemed like it was only for her. His eyes traveled back up her body, and she loved how his fists clenched at his sides. He wanted her, and she reveled in it.

  In reality she’d been wrestling with the need to end things, but here she was free to experience all he had to offer as much as she needed. He was what she desired more than anything in her long life. Her body was always ready for him. She frowned at just how needy she felt. It deepened when she realized she wanted more than the usual violent coupling. She watched his hands flex as if he wanted to grab her. Dream Vane was no less thrilling than the real male. He was strong, and her beast loved and needed that in a partner.

  “Come here, and show me what we do in your dreams.” His eyes flashed with wickedness as he taunted her. His beautiful pierced cock glinted in the light, and she shook her head. Since this was all in her dreams, she wanted more than she would ever truly allow. She wanted to fall into the experience and decided to take what she was denied in the only place she was safe to do so.

  She closed the foot-wide gap, rose to her tiptoes, and pulled him down gently by his long sun-kissed hair. She felt his body tense. He had been expecting her usual attack, and the gentleness surprised him. She grinned for a second before his lips came down on hers. He was just as hungry as she was. She tasted and explored him like she’d never done. She wanted him in a way that was foreign to her, desperate, dangerous.

  He could never be her mate, the species never blended, but in her dreams it was possible. She swallowed back the sad thoughts. That was not how she was. She was strong, brash and a bitch. Not soft and needy.

  His tongue seduced hers, caressing and taunting her. She felt his big hands trail down her back until they were cupping her ass, lifting her to straddle his hips. His hard, pierced cock lodged between them in the best way. She groaned deep as her fluid slicked along his length.

  “So wet for me, mmm. What else do you dream?”

  “I dream of making love for the first time in my life.” Her mind said the words her mouth would never admit.

  He stilled and then growled into her mouth. “You want me to be gentle with you.” His words were a statement. The feel of him in her mind felt like the softest caress imaginable. An added intimacy that made the experience hotter. Her skin tingled in anticipation. She’d never wanted anything more in her long life.

  He moved his hand up to her lower back and lowered them to a soft bed her mind conjured for them. The setting hadn’t changed. They were still in the beautiful sunny meadow. Birds chirped happily in the trees far away.

  Vane’s tanned muscles were glorious in the sunlight. Why had she never stripped him bare in the middle of the day? She shook off the stupidity of the thought. Nothing about this was a possibility in their real lives. There, she made sure to keep everything that didn’t involve fucking out of her mind. That had unfortunately gotten harder since his relocation to Tetartos.

  “There will be no going back from this,” he said as he gazed down at her. There was seriousness, a jarring truth in his eyes that stilled her for a moment. She ran her fingers through his hair and pulled him down. She wanted to experience this, just once. He purred against her lips, and she moaned deep. Her back arched off the soft bedding, bringing her breasts and hard nipples up against his hot chest. He stayed that way, kissing her slowly as if he had all the time in the world. She reached between them to stroke his big, beautiful cock.

  He groaned deep before whispering in her mind, “Put your hands over your head, Brianne. If you want me to make love to you, I need your hands off my dick.”

  She smiled against his lips and complied without complaint. He stopped and looked down at her with furrowed brows. She smiled up at a confused, dream Vane. She had never been a compliant female; she fought him, always forced him into proving his dominance. Her beast loved that. In a split second he was kissing her again, his hands roving over her sides up to her head. He held her head softly, caressing her jaw and neck as he kissed her to a point that left her feeling dizzy.

  His lips trailed to her neck and ear, leaving heated tingles all over her. The sensation stayed even as his lips moved to other territory. She writhed and moaned under the tender assault. Never would she have imagined the sensations that rocked her, the disorientation she allowed to roll over her, giving herself permission to surrender completely to him because it wasn’t real.

  His mouth sought out her nipples, licking and sucking until she actually begged for his cock. “I need you.” She gasped, and he groaned as he sucked harder. As soon as he moved from them, she was finally able to take in a stuttered breath. Soft kisses trailed dow
n her stomach and mound before his lips met her wet pussy.

  “Fuck, Brianne. I’ve never tasted anything as sweet as your pussy. I want every bit of that sweet scent all over me.”

  She groaned at how pained his voice was. Her hips rose and circled against his face, and her beast beat at her to mark him with her scent and bite. She wanted to be all over him. Wanted all the Realms to know he belonged to her. Wanted so much more than they could ever have. She frowned that her mind was fucking up her fantasy. She shoved all thought away and focused on the things he did to her body. Thick fingers pumped inside her as he licked and sucked. His eyes closed, and he made soft purring noises against her clit, setting off a harsh orgasm that had her screaming into the sky.

  He watched her, his eyes more beast than man as he crawled up her body. “You’re mine after this, Brianne. I won’t ever settle for less.”

  The harsh demand in his voice sent flutters in her stomach. If only… She shook off the sadness that wanted to invade her perfect moment.

  His thick cock slid over her entrance as his fingers twined with hers. He pushed her hands into the bedding by her head, and he entered her so slowly. Her mouth dried up at how intense the experience was. She wanted to look away. “Look into my eyes as I claim you, Brianne. I want to see every emotion as I do this. Do you understand?”

  Something inside her wanted that too. “Yes.”

  His cock burrowed inside slowly, and he circled his hips. She felt the jewelry on his cock rub inside her, and she moaned. Gods but she loved that he’d done that. “This is mine; you are mine now,” he said as he claimed every inch of her while his hands held hers tight to the bedding.

  “Mmm,” she agreed.

  She wrapped her legs around his hips and met every slick thrust. Every time she felt like she would explode, he eased her back. Their breathing was ragged and tight as he took her deeper, hitting the spot that would push her over. He held her like he never wanted to let her go. Her heart ached before her body overtook her completely. They rocked back and forth, his hands never leaving hers, his eyes never looking away, except when he kissed her.

  Soon she crested in an orgasm that seemed to pull her soul from her body. She cried out at the same time she listened to him shouting his own release. His heated jets of semen bathed her womb, and she had never felt so incredibly sated. He rolled to his side and tucked her into his body. Snuggling against him was another first for her, they’d never rested together. She felt sleep come for her as an odd feeling settled inside her body. Sleep within sleep?

  Chapter 9

  Dorian’s Island, Earth Realm

  Dorian was addicted to looking through her eyes. He wanted her, had wanted her from the start, but knew he couldn’t have her. Why would fate give him a mate? It was fucking unfair. It was what every Immortal dreamed of, and he hadn’t been immune to those desires. At least not a hundred years ago.

  He stood on the beach, looking out to the orange horizon. He inhaled deeply of the salty air and massaged the back of his neck. It had been nearly two weeks of pure hell. He wasn’t able to stay out of her mind. He craved a glimpse before each battle, then again when he finally made it home, exhausted.

  He was stalking her. For weeks he’d been fighting a war within himself. The need to suffer was a harsh pull in his gut, but seeing through her eyes countless times a day was pulling him in the opposite direction. Witnessing the toll it was taking on her was screwing with him. If he were only denying himself, he could do it forever. He was built to take the pain, but she wasn’t. He fucked up by touching her. Later, he’d convinced himself that Sirena was making shit up. That Rain wasn’t hurting with him, that the little Mageia was better off without him.

  He couldn’t get the tension to leave his neck, no matter how much he massaged the tendons.

  She’d moved into a cottage at the manor. He saw her arranging her things and unpacking. Tiny clothes and even smaller lingerie. He fucking wanted to rip the bits of silk from her body. Make her stay naked instead. His cock throbbed with that thought.

  He closed his eyes and felt a breeze over his bare arms. He slipped into the link with ease. Her face peered back at him. She looked over her shoulder before looking back into the mirror. His breath caught at how fucking beautiful she was, even with how exhausted she looked. The small mirror gave him a glimpse of her gorgeous breasts, peaked and ready for his mouth and hands. She brushed her teeth. Was likely getting ready for bed. Would he see her spread her tan thighs to work her fingers in and out of her pussy again? He moaned at the memories of watching her play with her little pierced clit. Fuck.

  She was looking increasingly tired. Every day it was getting worse, and that ate at him. He saw it more in the last couple of days, making it difficult to deny that she was feeling the same effects he was. She didn’t deserve to suffer any more than she deserved having him as a mate. He was a damaged piece of shit, and claiming her would only put her in more danger. Though it also gave her some power to protect herself. Damn it, Cahal wasn’t weak, he was an Immortal, and he hadn’t been able to save himself.

  He felt the minute Drake appeared next to him.

  He opened his eyes and looked at his leader. He knew what was coming. Had been dreading it. Sirena hadn’t come up with anything to ease Rain. How long could he justify putting an innocent through this shit with him? That was the question he’d asked himself every time he saw her eyes in the mirror. Each time he saw the pain and sadness there and told himself it was for the best. That she was better off.

  “Are you done punishing yourself?” Drake asked.

  “When would it be enough?” he asked with derision.

  “She’s suffering with you,” Drake growled at him. “It’s over.”

  Drake’s words pierced his gut. From anyone else, he managed to convince himself they were lying or exaggerating, but he heard the truth in Drake’s voice and saw the evidence when he looked through her eyes.

  “Sirena might come up with something to dull the effects until we can figure it out.” He knew the argument wouldn’t hold. He pulled at the back of his hair and looked out to the water again.

  “Don’t test me, Dorian. I let it go because you needed to feel like you’d atoned for Cahal’s death. I don’t need to tell you what having another mated pair would mean for your brethren and our fight. I also don’t need to tell you that suffering any longer dishonor’s Cahal’s memory. He was a good male, fought alongside the other warriors with honor, and he deserves better.” Drake looked out to the horizon. “He would not want this.” His leader took a deep breath.

  He fought the guilt flowing in his veins. Cahal was denied the gift Dorian was given. Something he didn’t fucking deserve, but desired more than anything. It felt like a lifetime had passed since he touched her, tasted her lips. The frenzy was a bitch, amplifying everything between them to the millionth degree.

  “Rain is a good female, and I can’t, in good conscience, give you more time.”

  She was in pain and he was the only one that could make it stop. He was the fucking reason she was miserable.

  Dorian nodded and pulled at his hair again. He would talk to Sirena. He wouldn’t let his mate suffer…. He’d known it was coming. He would claim her, but he could still find a way out of Rain seeing his memories in the blood bonding. That was one thing he couldn’t stomach. His last holdout. He imagined the guilt would always plague him for claiming her, for not punishing himself harder, but she hadn’t done anything to merit suffering with him.

  His leader pinned him with a hard stare. “Get it done. You have tonight to think. You’re off rotation tomorrow.”

  We have hell beasts in all five cities again, Uri growled through the link.

  “I’m getting really tired of this shit.” Smoke filtered through Drake’s lips as he spoke.

  Chapter 10

  Lofodes, Tetartos Realm

  Rain was finally getting used to being teleported. Thank the Creators for that. The rest of her life was go
ing to shit, but hey, silver lining, she didn’t want to throw up all over her shoes as she and Alyssa reformed outside of Lofodes.

  “Are you okay?” Alyssa asked in concern as Rain took a second to get back to normal.

  “Yeah, I’m good.” She tried for a convincing grin, but the look on Alyssa’s face indicated that her attempt failed miserably. She blew out a breath. It had been a week since her encounter with Dorian. The increasing arousal was driving her crazy and getting painful, but at least Conn helped her move into a small cottage. She loved that it was by a lake and had an intercom to the manor. There was a small kitchen, so she didn’t have to see anyone, and she was settling in for the most part. The tension from the constant arousal was wearing her down. It was always there. That unsettling feeling of being watched was getting to her too. She needed to get Uri to help with a mental shield. Alyssa tried to explain it but wasn’t able to get inside her mind to help her. Uri and the other Guardians had been so busy she hadn’t felt right tracking him down to help her.

  “Why don’t I believe you?” Alyssa said, shaking her head.

  “How about, fine as I can be when I’m constantly horny and everyone knows it?” Rain tried for a laugh.

  “I’m sorry you have to go through this. I hope you make him grovel on hands and knees when he does come for you. Rain, I promise that Gregoire said he’ll make you a good mate once he gets his head straight,” her friend said with a scowl. Alyssa really wanted her mated, and she knew why. She wanted Rain to gain Immortality. No one wanted to watch their loved ones die, and if Rain finally finished the mating with Dorian, she wouldn’t. At least not from old age. A severed head, yes. She cringed at that gruesome thought.

  “I’m not so sure, but if he does come for me, it better be on his knees.” Damn. Her attempt at bravado conjured an image of him on the ground with her leg over his shoulder. She nearly groaned out loud, and her face heated. She could see Alyssa turning her back.